How can i get through you? ..i know u not doing well ..come back plz

Am writing this to you because I have no idea how to get through to you. You never seem to be ok with yourself, or how you’ve turned out in life, and you always seem to be looking for something wrong with the way things are. You can never just accept things on face-value and always look for deeper meanings when often there aren’t any. Sometimes life just “is". There’s no rhyme or reason to it, it just is. People will say things to you without having any sort of ulterior motive; they are just concerned for your general well-being. Whilst this is not always the case, you have to accept that these things do actually happen, so don’t twist things around in your head and get yourself all worked up about it. 

I need you to understand that you are ok. You have your ups and downs, but you’re ok. Just try to relax a little and enjoy the life that you have. Go out there, be yourself and love who you are. By loving yourself, hopefully someone else will learn to love you too. I know you feel alone, but you’re not. You have friends and family who love you dearly.

I know you don’t think you’re the “nice girl" that 95% of people get to see. You think that you’re really living in that 5%, and what everyone else see’s is a lie. I can tell you right now, that’s not true. You really are a nice girl. Yes, you’ve made some mistakes. Done things that you regret, unintentionally hurt people that didn’t deserve it, and said things that you should have kept to yourself. The important thing is to accept that this has happened, and learn from it. Instead of calling them “mistakes", call them “experiences" instead.

I know right now you don’t feel ok. You’re back in that rut, thinking that every time you get climb out of this hole and start to feel ok with yourself, someone or something seems to kick you off the edge and you’re falling right back down there again. The important thing to remember, is to never give up climbing out of that hole. Eventually you’ll make it, and find someone to help you fill that hole in once and for all so that you never fall down it again.

I’m sorry that I haven’t always been there to help you, and that this letter makes no sense. It’s very hard to write this to you. So many things I’ve been thinking for quite some time, but never figured out how to tell you. Hopefully you will read this and understand. 

I know that you’ll be ok. I know this because I know you better than you think. I know this, because I am you. I understand this place is for writing letters to people you feel you cannot contact, or have lost. I am writing this to you on here because I feel like I’ve lost you somewhere in that mind of ours. Please come back to me, I’ll be here for you when you’re ready.

d miss ya a lot